I like your pairing of freezing rain with the listing ferry a lot.
I wonder, though, about 'lists'. It's a great word and yours may be an acceptable usage, but I think of it as a state of being, as in lists/listed/listing to one side. It just doesn't seem to be an active enough word for this haiku.
josh - you make a very good point. truth be told, I had used the word "lurches" first, settling upon "lists" even though I knew it wasn't exactly perfect. I agree that the pairing is good enough to deserve a bit more scrutiny. thanks for reading!
2 Comments:
I like your pairing of freezing rain with the listing ferry a lot.
I wonder, though, about 'lists'. It's a great word and yours may be an acceptable usage, but I think of it as a state of being, as in lists/listed/listing to one side. It just doesn't seem to be an active enough word for this haiku.
I've been enjoying your poems here.
Happy holidays,
josh
josh - you make a very good point. truth be told, I had used the word "lurches" first, settling upon "lists" even though I knew it wasn't exactly perfect. I agree that the pairing is good enough to deserve a bit more scrutiny. thanks for reading!
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